Tantra for dating

Tantra – A Game Changer for Dating

The principles of Tantra can be very nicely applied to many aspects of love. And for the different phases of romantic love.

The way we approach love and dating is radically changed when we understand that Tantra is a perspective of seeing everything and everyone as expressions of the Divine. Everything thing we experience as a human can serve to expand our consciousness and our capacity for love.

As Tantra scholar and practitioner, Christopher Wallis has once said…

“Tantra teaches that though the Divine is more than meets the eye, it is also everything the eye can meet (or the ear can hear, or the noise can smell, and so on).”

Tantra teaches that though the Divine is more than meets the eye, it is also everything the eye can meet (or the ear can hear, or the nose can smell, and so on):

Christopher Hareesh Wallis, 2015.

Dating from a Tantra perspective cultivates more love and connection.

This Tantric view of the world makes it ideal for us to use as a tool to cultivate more love and connection with others, on a range of levels… from physical intimacy, to emotional and spiritual connection.

When we are dating someone, we are in the first initial phase of attraction and connecting with that person. The conventional approach to dating, the non-tantric approach, encourages us to think that there is, or could be, something wrong with other people, and even something wrong with us.

Modern society conditions us to be overly focused on looking for the faults and imperfections of someone we are doing. At the same time we have been conditioned to feel that we may have too many faults and imperfections to be worthy of true love. Often at a subconscious level we have a belief that we don’t deserve to have a fulfilling relationship with a quality loving partner. And we end up self-sabotaging our dating efforts, as we too easily find excuses and reasons to reject potential partners.

By focusing on the faults and imperfections we can end up closing the door on many wonderful opportunities to meet and connect with incredible and loving individuals.

Most modern dating apps devalue you as a person.

Social media encourages us to focus on our imperfections and to compare ourself with others. This unloving attitude towards ourself and others has created a culture of disposable dating. Modern dating apps have turned dating into almost a video game where you can entertain yourself by swiping through photos of men and women, and get a dopamine hit when someone matches with you.

This unloving approach to trying to find deep and loving connection with someone, does more harm than good.

Tantric Dating honours you (and others) as a special sacred being.

On the other hand, the Tantric approach to dating starts from the basis that everyone is an expression of Divine consciousness, and everyone is worthy of love.

The tantric view allows you to realise that you are special, and beautiful, including your imperfections, and that you are worthy of love, that you are worthy of quality relationships with wonderful people.

This realisation in and of itself has a huge impact on the pyschology of our non-verbal communication. When we take this Tantric approach, and start loving ourselves for the radiant loving spark of Divine consciousness that we are, we start transmitting a very different quality of vibration than we had done previously. This causes us to change the subconscious signals we put out into the Universe and start to attract a very different quality of potential romantic partners.

In addition, taking a tantric approach to dating allows us see past the superficial imperfections of others, through to the true deeper beauty of a person. From a tantric perspective we recognise everyone as being a unique expression of the Divine. When we cultivate within ourselves that love of the Divine, the Divine within us, and within others, we are able to sense the deeper beauty in another person.

In Tantric dating everyone we meet is potentially our beloved.

That sense of beloved may only be for a moment, or for one date. It may well be that we discover we don’t have much in common after all, and after the first date we’ll never see them again.

But even then, we have experienced something beautiful and loving, in those short moments with that person. We have briefly opened up to the loving energy of the Universe. We have changed our own personal frequency and we have started to transmit a loving vibration that sooner or later draws to us a partner of a compatible vibration.


The Tantric Life Podcast

Listen to the podcast episode of this topic on your preferred platform, here: E29 Tantra – A Game Changer for Dating.


This tantric approach makes the whole process of dating much lighter, more fun and joyful. And all of our dating experiences become beautiful, uplifting and enriching, regardless of whether or not it works out that that individual.

Tantric love and marriage therapist Catherine Auman, says about dating…

“If we’re always thinking I can’t love this other person because they aren’t good enough for me, that about you, not the other person. How about [instead]: Let me enjoy this other spiritual being, and even if it’s not the romantic fantasy, we are in this perfect spot together sharing love in this perfect moment.”

If we’re always thinking “I can’t love this other person because they aren’t good enough for me”, that’s about you, not the other person. how about [instead]: Let me enjoy this other spiritual being, and even if it’s not the romantic fantasy, we are in this perfect spot together sharing love in this perfect moment.

Catherine Auman, 2020.

YuTantra is the Tantric alternative to conventional online dating apps.

This Tantric approach to love and dating is the basis for the online Tantra dating and friendship community which I founded, called YuTantra.  YuTantra.com is a safe online space where you can find and connect with others who share your interest in Tantra. Whether you are looking for dating, new friendships, or local Tantra events, on YuTantra you will find a respectful community of intelligent and beautiful souls seeking out something in common with you.

One of the founding values of YuTantra is authenticity.

When I created YuTantra, I wanted to provide an alternative to the superficial apps and online dating sites that seem to be trending in recent years.

YuTantra is based on the Tantric approach to have more love and awareness in the dating process. It’s not like Tinder, where you log in because you’re bored and you just flick through pictures to get that dopamine hit every time someone matches with you. On YuTantra you won’t find any “swiping” here.

Instead of discarding potential matches at the bat of an eyelid because of a single photo, you have the opportunity to see the depth and wisdom of the members here. In addition, measures are taken to ensure that only genuine and serious profiles are approved.

So to wrap up, Tantra is a wonderful perspective to cultivate for yourself, that can radically change your dating experiences, and help you to manifest a quality loving partner in your life.


Check out these other posts about Tantric Dating…

Why Do I Keep Attracting the Same Type of Partner? – A Tantric Perspective.

Tantric Dating: Is This Love Block Stopping You From Finding Your Soulmate?

Tantric Dating – Why is Dating so Hard?


References:

Auman, C. (2020). Tantric Dating: Bringing Love and Awareness to the Dating Process. (2nd edition). Green Tara Press. 

Wallis, C. D. (2015, August 2nd). What is Tantra?: Setting the Record Straight. hareesh.org. https://hareesh.org/blog/2015/8/2/what-is-tantra?rq=what%20is%20tantra

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