The Shadow Self, Tantra, and Samskaras
This summer I have been going deep into my own work with my Shadow self. This has been part of a new and exciting project that I’m working on. My partner and I are creating an amazing coaching program for single women who want to manifest soul level love. Part of it is about embracing your Shadow in order to live more in your authentic powerful self.
So as we’ve been putting together the content for the program I’ve also been doing my own shadow work… and it is really powerful.
It has made me realise a deeper level of understanding of Tantra.
It has helped me to really see and experience the fundamental essence of Tantra… which is to embrace every aspect of what it means to be human. To bring the light of the higher self to the darkness of your lower nature.
The Shadow Self is an inseparable part of human nature.
I was originally drawn to Tantra because it offers us the possibility of bringing together spirituality and sexuality.
But now I see it as much more than that.
I mean, bringing spirituality and sexuality together, really implies so much more. It implies that you recognise not only your desires and urges, but also your wounds and your conditioning from the past.
Tantra calls upon us to fully integrate all the parts of ourselves. Even those parts which we have repressed, hidden away, and which we are appalled by, disgusted by, or afraid of.
Many traditional spiritual paths teach that you should disconnect those parts, that you should reject them, disown them, and try to rise above and transcend all things negative within us.
But Tantra understands that we cannot escape from the dark side of our nature. We cannot run away from the things we don’t like about ourselves. They are deeply embedded in our psyche, and have been with us all our life. Trying to pretend they aren’t there is like trying run away from the shadow that is cast on the ground by the bright sun. That’s why it’s called the Shadow, because it is inseperable from you.
Shadow Self Psychology helps us to understand human behaviour
Modern psychology acknowledges the existence and influence of repressed energies that dwell in our subconscious. As psychologist Lisa Firestone (2013) says, painful experiences in childhood which we have mostly forgotten or prefer to ignore are an example of how we can develop certain personality traits which may lead us to become protective, defensive, or suspicious of certain situations in adult life, typically in this case in love and dating.
It was mostly the work of Carl Jung that provided the basis for today’s modern psychology of the Shadow self.
Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser it is.
Carl Jung (1959).
The Shadow Self is our dark side.
It is our lost and forgotten disowned self. Your Shadow is the place within you that contains all of your secrets, repressed feelings, primitive impulses, and parts deemed “unacceptable,” shameful, “sinful” or even “evil.”
This hidden place lurking within your unconscious mind also contains suppressed and rejected emotions such as rage, jealousy, hatred, greed, deceitfulness, and selfishness.
It is that part of you that you want to hide from others, and even that you want to hide from yourself. You want to hide it because you are either afraid of it, or ashamed of it, or embarrased, or horrified at the idea that you could be that thing. It is the monster hiding under the bed.
When the Shadow is shunned and ignored, it tends to undermine and sabotage our lives. and various neuroses are all attributed to the Shadow Self, such as addictions, low self-esteem, mental illness, even physical illnesses.
When our Shadow is suppressed or repressed in the unconscious long enough, it can really damage our lives and cause psychosis or extreme forms of behavior like cheating on one’s partner or physically harming others. In some cases intoxicants such as drugs or alcohol can also unleash the Shadow. Have you or someone you know ever got so drunk that you did or said something that you later really regretted, I mean more than regretted, like were really surprised and appalled or ashamed by it? Well that was the Shadow trying to free itself.
Your Shadow self starts to form in early childhood. One one hand it is part of the natural development of our sense of identify as we grow up. But on the other hand it often also involves a more extreme and unhealthy process from social conditioning, from our parents, our peers, our schooling, etc. As an infant, you learned that many of your behaviours, your emotions, your basic beliefs, would either be welcomed and encouraged as acceptable, or shunned, disapproved of, or even punished. Those aspects of you which were disapproved of… the wild, authentic, socially taboo things, ended up being pushed away into the subconscious… thus creating your Shadow. In order to be accepted, approved, and loved we learned to act in certain ways. We adopted certain roles for speicific situations, that would ensure our mental, emotional, and physical survival. These then became our masks… the means by which we would only show to people those aspects of ourselves that would make us loved and accepted, that would avoid punishment or criticism.
In yoga this is referred to as the Samskaras.
The Shadow Self and Samskaras both describe the same phenomena.
Your samskaras are the accumulated energies of all subliminal impressions of past painful or pleasurable experiences.
Tantric scholar practitioner Christopher “Hareesh” Wallis describes samskaras as… “When we experience aversion to a painful experience, or attachment to a pleasurable one, then an impression of that experience is laid down in our psyche, which is said to be a ‘seed’ of experience which will sprout again.”
When we experience aversion to a painful experience, or attachment to a pleasurable one, then an impression of that experience is laid down in our psyche, which is said to be a ‘seed’ of experience which will sprout again.
Christopher “Hareesh” Wallis (2015).
That seed contributes to our Shadow, and it will sprout again in some form or another, influencing our behaviour at a mostly subconscious level. When we brush away the emotions of intense expereinces, when we ignore our feelings of getting stirred up, and just try to push it down and get on with life, those energies can resurface in ways we don’t expect, and sometimes in destructive or harmful ways.
Tantra uses the metaphor of “digesting” emotions. The Tantrik master Kshemaraja writes about this in his Tantric text called The Recognition Sutras, written about a thousand years ago.
In that text we find a description of how experiences that are not fully processed, or digested, are basically pushed into the subconscious where they fester over time, and continue to influence our daily life, unconsciously shaping the way we react to and perceive the world. If we are able to bring those experiences back into the light of our conscious awareness, and allow them to be fully digested, they then no longer have a negative unconscious affect in our lives.
The following passage is quoted from the Recognition Sutras…
But when . . . any [unresolved] experience deposits internally as an impression (as a saṃskāra) charged with feelings such as anxiety and so on, then [that impression] exists in the state of concealment, becoming a ‘seed’ of saṃsāra that will arise again. However, when something that has been internally deposited in this way, or even something that is actually being experienced now, becomes one with the Fire of Consciousness through the process of ‘sudden digestion’ (haṭha-pāka), also known as the method of ‘total devouring’, then it is said to be graced, because it has been integrated into the state of complete fullness.
RECOGNITION SUTRAS translated by Christopher Wallis (2015).
So this process of integrating our samskaras is, I believe, what modern psychology is referring to when talking about doing Shadow Work, the practice of recognising and integrating your shadow.
What I love about this passage from the Recognition Sutras is that last line… “it has been integrated into the state of complete fullness.” This, to me, is what Tantra is all about… as you gradually integrate all parts of yourself you become a more complete version of yourself, embodying your full potential.
Of course, it isn’t easy to integrate the Shadow. Confronting your Shadow isn’t very popular… for sure it doesn’t really sound like much fun. Who enjoys owning their flaws, weaknesses, selfishness, nastiness, envy, hate, and so on?
But we can only run from our shadows for so long. Over time, all of the ego’s tricks – repression, denial, suppression, escape – become less effective. What we’ve been hiding from begins to bubble to the surface. And every now and then bits of it burst out in some sort of uncontrolled expression, whether that be losing our temper, throwing insults, being hurtful or spiteful, or having some sort of breakdown, running away from some situation, or slipping into a depression.
Those are our samskaras, draining our energy and holding us back from truly living our full potential in life.
Listen to the podcast episode of this post, over on anchor.fm
But it’s important to keep in mind that our Shadow has within it the seeds of our own powerful beauty. Much of what we see in the Shadow is a distorted version of something very positive and empowering. Not everything within our Shadow is doom and gloom. It can be helpful to think of your Shadow as actually being a Golden Shadow.
If we think of our Shadow as a Golden Shadow we appreciate the ways it can benefit us.
Jung once stated that “the shadow is ninety percent pure gold.” What this means is that there are many beautiful gifts offered to us by our Shadow side if we take the time to look. For example, so much of our creative potential is submerged within our darkness because when we were infants we were taught to reject it.
By recognising and integrating our Shadow we can gain more stability, and more confidence.
In working with your shadow, you liberate a vast reservoir of energy, energy that was unconcsiously being used to maintain your self-image and your semi-false masks. When this energy is freed up, it can improve your physical, mental, and emotional health. It can bring you inner strength and a greater sense of balance, making you better equipped to take on life’s challenges.
With that energy we can become much more creative and productive than ever before. And we have more capacity for empathy, compassion, and love.
As you integrate your shadow and come to terms with your darker half, you see yourself more clearly. You become more grounded, even more human.
When you can accept your own darker parts, it is easier to accept the shadow in others. As a result, other people’s behavior and attitudes won’t trigger you as easily.
You’ll also have an easier time communicating with others. You may notice an improvement in all of your relationships, with your family, your friends, and of course with potential partners.
And by allowing those darker parts of us to come out we transmit our authentic beauty.
I think it’s also important to bear in mind that we’re not talking about getting rid of the Shadow. The thing is that your Shadow doesn’t go away, it will never go away. The Shadow is with us for life, that’s just the nature of being human. It’s a normal part of human psychology.
Our goal is not to try to get rid of the Shadow, but to integrate it.
Integration of the Shadow basically means going through the steps of recoginising it, accepting that we have it, allowing it to be there, and then gently leaning in to embrace it and welcome it into our conscious awareness.
When we start to bring those disowned parts of ourselves into conscious awareness, they transform from being toxic and destructive, into the golden treasures of our hidden potential. The monster under the bed becomes a great ally to empower us with noble qualities.
In Tantrik philosophy, as we welcome and embrace the Shadow, the samskaras associated with those parts of ourselves are said to dissolve. The way I interpret that is that, althought the Shadow as a whole doesn’t go away, the specific samskaras associate with the repressed and ignored energies are transformed into healthy and empowering qualitites. Those things are no longer hidden and rejected, thus what were samskaras are now positive qualities that we can incorporate into our personality.
So how do we integrate our Shadow and dissolve our samskaras?
This is what is known in psychology as Shadow Work. There are many ways and practices to start to become aware of your Shadow.
In Tantrik philosophy it is spiritual practice that is said to “burn the seeds” of samskaras. And this is done by generally three modes of practice.
One is with somatic practice… physical exercises, such as yoga, tai chi, or other somatic exercises. The aim of somatic practice is to release blocked energy that gets stuck in parts of the body and stagnates. Exploring the feelings of the body can help you to identify aspects of your Shadow. Sensing for discomfort, or blocked energy, and then breathing into it, and moving the body, can help to bring those parts of the Shadow into your conscious awareness.
The second Tantric approach is with some sort of sitting-still-and-listening practice. A type of meditation in which you create a safe and non-judgemental space for those samskaras to arise and be digested and released. This type of meditation is approached with the attitude of “I’m willing to see whatever needs to be seen; I’m willing to feel whatever needs to be felt.”
The third mode is a process of careful self analysis, careful inspection of your inner being to be clear that your motives are aligned with your higher self, that you are not deceiving yourself, that you are being brutally honest and truthful with yourself. This process is not for the faint-of-heart, and often needs the help of a good teacher or coach to hold up that mirror and hold you accountable.
Being fully present with our shadow and samskaras is essential if we are to become more whole and integrated.
The important key in Shadow work and releasing our samskaras is to allow ourselves to be fuly present whenever they arise, whenever we bring them into conscious awareness, and whenever they are activated by us getting triggered. If you can fully be present with the emotion that is arising (fear, pain, or craving, for example), allowing it to pass through without judging it or yourself for having it, then a portion of the samskāra that it is arising from is dissolved.
And even if you do find yourself judging yourself, it’s ok. Self-judgement is in-and-of-itself a Shadow, and frequently accompanies other Shadow elements. You don’t need to feel that you shouldn’t be judging yourself. If you can just notice it, then you are already making it conscious, and not repressed.
If you can just be with it and let the feelings pass through your body, let the thoughts pass through your mind, breathing into it, then you are doing the work. You gradually dissolve the samskara, and start to integrate the Shadow.
Little by little you transform the monsters under the bed into powerful allies that will liberate you. You will gain a greater sense of freedom, breaking away from the burdens that have been holding you back all your life, and empowering you to step into your beautiful authentic self.
Even just starting the process of integrating your Shadow you will already start to truly live your full potential.
The Tantric Life Podcast
Listen to my podcast episode of this post on your preferred platform over at anchor.fm
Sources:
Alethia (2022, June 23rd). Shadow Work: 13 Dark Archetypes. Loner Wolf. https://lonerwolf.com/shadow-work-demons/
Firestone, L. (2013, November 20th). 8 Reasons You Might Still Be Single. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassion-matters/201311/8-reasons-you-might-still-be-single.
Jung, C. G. (1959). The Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious. (The collected works of C.G. Jung, Volume 9, part 1) Routledge & Kegan Paul.
Wallis, C. (2015, October 5th). Embodied Liberation: the goal of Tantrik Yoga. Hareesh.org. https://hareesh.org/blog/2017/5/13/embodied-liberation-the-goal-of-tantrik-yoga?rq=Kshemar%C4%81ja.
Wallis, C. (2015, October 5th). The Power of Subtle Impressions (Samskaara Theory). Hareesh.org. https://hareesh.org/blog/2015/9/21/impressions-of-past-lives.
Unfortunately, I only came across Jung’s work on The Shadow Self earlier this year. But I can see it is an important ‘house-cleaning’ exercise for everyone to do. It’s something that I need to get working on right away!
On a different note, when I first encountered the idea of the Shadow-Self, I thought of this Tennessee Williams quote.
“Kill off all my demons and my angels might die too.”
Interesting quote DharmaSeeker! Yes, Shadow work is not usually something that we can get excited about… not like, for example, other more fun Tantric practices! But once you get into your Shadow work you realise how incredibly liberating and empowering it can be. Thanks for sharing your insights here.
Jordan Peterson in his discussion with Slavoj Zizek said that
“The light that you discover in your life is proportionate to the amount of the darkness you are willing to forthrightly confront.”
I suppose this is a simple way of stating the need to confront your shadows. As you say, it isn’t fun but it is a necessary housecleaning exercise with significant long-term benefits.
Very interesting quote from Jordan Peterson. Yes, many teachers recognise the importance of Shadow work. It’s certainly a universal and fundamental aspect of human personal growth. Carl Jung is quoted as saying “One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious” .
I’m afraid I still haven’t started my shadow work yet. I am trying to lay some groundwork to have a clear idea of what to do.
I found this article to be quite helpful in giving some solid nuts and bolts on the nuts and bolts on how to start shadow work. I think it effectively compliments your article, which focuses more on the background and benefits of shadow work.
https://www.betterup.com/blog/shadow-work
These two links also look as if they have some good stuff on the nuts and bolts of shadow work. They are from a website for people who are battling alcoholism!
https://www.soberish.co/shadow-work/
https://www.soberish.co/how-to-find-your-shadow-self/
Thank you DharmaSeeker for sharing these links. Those articles look very comprehensive. I’m going to look them over when I have time 👍
I’ve finally rolled up my sleeves and started doing shadow work.
It feels as if I’m in a field digging through layers of horse excrement with the hope of finding gold and diamonds. I’ve only found manure so far!
Thanks to your article, I have been doing shadow work for about three months.
It has certainly been a very bumpy ride. For the first few days, I was paralyzed by dark thoughts.
However, I’ve discovered that the shadow is your best friend once you communicate with it. I’ve found my shadow seems to be of quite a dualistic nature in that it contains both great wisdom and also great silliness.
But my shadow has told me that it just wants to be heard, but there is no need to obey it.